No, I did not pee my pants.

The other day I got up early, put on my knee braces, took two puffs of my inhaler, and headed out with a crowd to run four miles. It was a local race to raise money for a local charity. It was very hot already at 8am. We started off the first mile by climbing over a bridge. This was just a dose of the rest of the race of various hills and bridges winding around a small city. Not cool man, not cool. Along this race, they had water stops every mile, which was awesome. By mile 3, they handed out a new surprise of cold wet towels to wipe your face, put on your neck and help you feel less like you’re going to pass out. I had never been to a race that had done that. It felt so nice. When I crossed the finish line, they were handing out more towels of heaven. Of course I took one to enjoy.

I wandered over to the coolers to grab some chocolate milk, water, and a snack and found a patch of shady grass to relax with my beverages and towel. I sat sipping on my drinks, learning to breathe like a normal person again, and enjoying the cool wet towel now sitting on my head. Once my drinks were empty, I stopped panting like a dog, and had removed my knee braces, it was time to find my car. As I stood up and looked down, I realized it look like I had peed my pants. Before putting the towel on my head, I had been holding the cloth over my lap, not thinking about the fact it had been dripping wet. Wearing light brown shorts, where ever the water had touched was now a very dark brown. Great, just great. I thought about moving into the sun to see if would dry my pants, but I didn’t want to take that time or get hot again. I did catch a small break. There were some people passing out some re-useable bags that were decent size. So I asked for one, threw my knee braces and snacks in it and wandered off to find my car awkwardly holding the bag more over the front of my pants then to the side like it would normally hang.

Moral of this story: Wear black pants to all races or when handed a cool wet towel, keep it on your head, shoulders or neck, never ever over your lap.